Long Distance Relationships Are Challenging But Not Impossible

With an increasingly global world, sometimes, life takes people who love one another far apart. The idea of a long-distance relationship can be daunting. The sitcom Modern Family parodied this, with Alex deciding long-distance can’t possibly work. She subsequently decided that she would not even try. With examples like this in pop culture, and the intake of breath at the idea, it’s no wonder that as a society we see these relationships as doomed.

However, sometimes, life forces us into circumstances that are outside of our control. Geography might make a relationship easier, but it doesn’t mean that it’s guaranteed to work. At the end of the day, all relationships are a risk, and all require work to be success. It just means that for those in love with someone overseas, they might have to work a bit harder.

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It’s hard when your loved one is overseas.

It doesn’t matter if your relationship is new, and you are struggling with the realities of getting used to one another. You can have an established relationship where circumstances have led you to need to live apart. The circumstances don’t matter, because the guide to surviving and flourishing stays the same. Every relationship is unique, but we all need the tools to cope with unusual and stressful situations.

Communication Is Vital: Talk About Everything

It goes without saying that when you’re long distance, the biggest tool in your arsenal is talking to one another. It’s your primary method of communication, and it’s how you find a way to touch base with one another and know you are in each other’s thoughts. It’s pretty obvious that you need to talk about the big things, decisions you have to make and major large events. As time goes on, through open and frank conversations, a time may come to talk to an immigration lawyer. It’s a process, it takes time – but it’s something you need to talk about to see that you’re on the same page.

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Communication is essential, and more so in a long distance relationship

What some couples who are trying to close the miles between them forget to do is talk about the small things. Think about the thousand and one conversations that couples who live close to one another have on an average week. They will talk about the things that have irritated them at work, the weather, the little things they saw that made them laugh. It’s these small, seemingly trivial things that make us who we are and give a proper account of our lives.

If you don’t bring these up to our long-distance partner, it can lead to a feeling of separation. You feel like you are living separately, divorced from the reality of one another. Say what you had for lunch; find ways to incorporate your life on both the big things and the small. It might sound a little dull to go over things in such detail, but it helps complete a full picture that skipping over them denies you.

Don’t End A Conversation Angry

There comes a point in all relationships where you get annoyed with each other. Frustrations boil over and neither of you seem to be getting what you want, or you’re just in plain old bad moods. If you live near one another, these matters are easily settled with the passage of time and a quick apology. It’s even easier if you’re in the same house, as no one wants to live in an uncomfortable situation.
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Cross words with someone you love can make you feel furstrated

If you don’t have that luxury, then arguments have even more of a potential to cause a problem. At times, you will inevitably get annoyed – that’s one of the signs you care. What are only small disagreements or problems can quickly become magnified, because you don’t have access to the quick fixes. Instead, the distance between you seems to become even bigger, as the silence magnifies when one of you hangs up.

If things are getting stressful, then you both have to agree you need to take a bit of time to calm down. Agree this tactic before you are even having an argument, so neither of you finds it passive-aggressive in the heat of the moment. Then, after an hour, get back in touch when you’re calmer and try to work through the issue.

Don’t end a call angry, and don’t give someone the silent treatment. It might be a reasonable thing to do if you live together, but it can be fatal across the miles. Make sure you’re both aware of this, and while you can take time to calm down, don’t let it go for too long.

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If you don’t get much time together, letting an argument sit is damaging.

On the upside, all of this practice is going to lead to an open and frank relationship. Your union is going to be healthier in the long run. It will be worth talking about the possibility of moving your relationship on at some stage, with one of you moving to be with the other.

You Can Still Do Things Together – But You Have To Improvise

Sometimes, you want to bond with your significant other in a way that doesn’t involve just talking. It might seem like you don’t have much option but to just talk, but that’s not the case at all.

For a start, you can play games together in real time thanks to the internet. Use the chat section of apps to talk as you do, just like you would chat and needle one another during a game in person.


Furthermore, you can use video chat to do household chores with each other. Cooking is particularly good for this, as you both prepare a meal while using the video function. This gives you an element of involvement with one another’s lives, as you can show what you’re doing rather than just talking to each other.

Respect Time Zones – Always

If you’re living in different time zones, there is another layer of difficulty adding on to the issue. It can also quickly become a bone of contention, particularly if one of you doesn’t respect the time difference.
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Is your lunchtime their bedtime? Think before you call!

Say you have a bad day at work; it’s only natural to want to talk to your partner about it. Don’t think you can call them at 4am “just this once” though – because they still have a life to lead, and you’d be disturbing that. It’s also rarely “just the once”; when you do it once, it doesn’t seem so bad to do it again. There are exceptions to this rule – such as family emergencies – but generally, you both have to agree to stick to the time zones.

It’s all about respect for one another, the need for good communication and being honest. It’s not ideal, but keep that in mind, and you’ll manage it – no matter what society and pop culture says.

How to Choose the Perfect-Shaped Wedding Ring

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Image by Vikini via Flickr

When it comes to trying on wedding rings, you’ll find that every shape and style looks as good on your finger as it does on the display case.

But don’t worry. There is a ring shape and style to flatter every finger and every hand. Here is our guide to choosing shaped wedding rings.


The Wedding Band Equation

 If you want to find the perfect match, consider this: finger width x finger length + wedding band style + ring shape = perfection. Before you start, visit Serendipity Diamond’s shaped wedding rings for more ideas.

When it comes to looking at different rings, start by considering the width and length of your finger. Also factor in the overall size of your hand. Take these factors into consideration, along with:


  • The style and width of the ring you like
  • The size and shape of the main stone


Another consideration is your usual nail shape and length. Do you keep your nails trimmed short, or do you prefer them shaped and long? Longer nails usually lengthen the appearance of your fingers- becoming part of the equation.


The Different Lengths

Long Fingers

Most styles tend to work well on rings for thin, long fingers. But consider these points when choosing a ring:

  • Round and princess-cut stones are particularly flattering
  • Wider bands will complement length
  • Long fingers can pull off bold styles


Slender Fingers

When choosing a ring for slender fingers, you don’t want to overpower the fingers:

  • Thicker bands will widen the look of your fingers
  • Smaller stones can make thing fingers look wider


Short Fingers

Rings for short fingers should make fingers look longer, no matter what width:

  • Narrow, slender-width bands can create the illusion of length
  • Pear, oval and marquise stones will lengthen the appearance of fingers
  • Rectangular-shaped stones lengthen short fingers- provided they aren’t so big that they overwhelm


Wide Fingers

When it comes to choosing rings for wide fingers, try to find a style that doesn’t show off too much skin on each side of the ring, or make fingers look wider. Consider the following styles:

  • Medium to thick bands
  • Round stones and cluster styles that are set in larger settings tend to flatter wider fingers
  • Choose marquise, wide oval, emerald or rectangular shapes. The narrow stones will make wider fingers look even wider.
  • Asymmetrical designs and angular shapes will minimize the width of fingers


Larger Knuckles

If you’re not particularly fond of your knuckles, the right ring can work to draw attention away from them:

  • Consider heavier, thicker bands which draw attention to the ring instead of the centre of your finger.

When choosing your wedding band, keep the bigger picture in mind – it’s not just about your finger, but you also need to consider your hand.


Smaller Hands

If you have smaller hands, try to keep the overall proportion of the ring small.  Princess-cut, small round, heart-shaped and oval stones tend to work especially well.


Larger Hands

  • Larger hands can get away with chunky, bulky styles of bands
  • Larger rings should suit your personality – there’s a lot more room to get creative

The Three Main Shapes of Wedding Rings

Wedding rings come in three main shaped:

  1. Shaped
  2. Court shaped
  3. D shaped

Take the above tips into consideration, and you will easily find the perfect pair of wedding bands.


4 Benefits Parents Could Get from Making a Will


One of the things most parents usually put off is writing a will. Apparently, there is a large number of parents from across the globe these days who do not have a will yet. It is something they don’t pay much attention to, but is really essential for the entire family.

A will is an important legal document that every parent needs to draft. We don’t want this to happen, but if you die, and you don’t have a will prepared for the court to see, then the law of intestacy will decide on what’s going to happen to your properties and money. Since a will ensures proper arrangements for your dependents, you won’t be worrying about the distribution of your possessions anymore. It can also aid you in organising your affairs after your death.

Moreover, it is highly recommended that you keep the list of your assets up-to-date. This is to ensure that you are aware of all your properties and you can trace them as well.

Here are some of the benefits you can get from making a last will and testament:

A will provides financial security for your family, especially your children

One of the most effective ways to guarantee the financial security of your entire family even when you are gone is by writing a will. This gives you greater peace of mind because you are assured that they will still live adequately after your death. Most importantly, your children’s future is already secured.

A will reduces stress for your loved ones

If people decide to challenge a will, NSW, BC, Scotland and New York have the best competent lawyers to help them. But this does not mean the process won’t be stressful and emotionally difficult for the people involved. That is why these lawyers encourage families to talk first before proceeding with the case. For sure you do not want their family relationship to be tarnished just because you decided not to make a will! Avoid this. Draft a will now and keep your family’s relationship strong

A will saves you money and quicken the whole legal process

A valid will assists your family with settling an estate quickly at a lesser cost. By drafting your will carefully with the aid of an experienced legal advisor, you can reduce the inheritance tax that needs to be paid. Additionally, you can save more from it and the value of your properties will also be secured.

A will specifies your funeral wishes

Whether you want to be cremated or buried the traditional way, your will can do the talking for you. You can actually write every funeral wish you might have when you die and include them in your will. Specifying your funeral wishes ensures that your body will be treated the way you want it to when you are gone.

The bottom line here is that creating a will should also be prioritised by parents. You might think it’s difficult and costly to draft one, but it’s not. Writing a will is simple and all you need is to carefully decide on who to pass on your possessions. You and your family can obtain all the benefits mentioned above once you have written a will accordingly.

Two Things That Will Ruin Your Marriage (And It’s Not What You Think)


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When we think about reasons for splitting up, we tend to think about betrayal and infidelity. However, the following two habits will lead you straight to the divorce courts.


  1. Negativity


It’s easy to fall into this trap. We all strive for a good life, and we want to be happy. However, sometimes the everyday things get in the way and ruin this picture. You may be unhappy or unfulfilled at work. You may be living in a house or apartment that you don’t like. There are aspects of your relationship that you’re worried about. Often it’s the little things that mount up. Before you know it you’re feeling frustrated and uneasy. Everything seems to be going wrong.

Now would be a good time to take a step back, assess the situation and act accordingly. Instead, you moan about everything that is wrong in your life. As soon as your partner walks through the door you’re off and bitching about your crappy day. It gathers momentum, and you include him in your criticism. You argue, and you reel back everything little thing he’s done wrong since you met seven years ago. Do you recognise this picture?

And it doesn’t end there. You make up again, but this run of negativity continues and becomes a feature of your married life. Before you know it you’ll be seeking an attorney who specialises in divorce and family law.

Recognise what you’re doing and stop. Being aware of it is the first step. If there are aspects of your life that you’re unhappy with, then work through them and work out how to fix them. Talk it through with your partner. And if you find yourself about to enter into the negative zone, think about positive things that have happened instead. In fact, people who write down three positive things that have happened to them each day, report feeling happier.


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  1. Lack of Communication


A lack of communication in any relationship is always bad news. With your partner, it can be disastrous. It starts off small. Just little things like staring at your phone when you’re out on a date. Or, staring at the TV all night. It also manifests in other ways. If you feel your partner doesn’t listen to you then suddenly you stop asking. He is completely unaware of this. And it goes both ways, of course. Soon, neither of you know what the other is thinking and resentment builds.

Communication is the cornerstone of any relationship. Remember when you were dating, and you talked all night? It all seemed effortless back then. You didn’t even need to think about it. Talking came naturally. But when you’re in a long-term relationship and everyday life takes over, communication is something you need to work on.

Start by going on dates again. Find a time when you’re both free. Put your phones on silent and switch off any distractions. Take time to talk to your partner and listen to what he has to say. Really listen. If there are things that he needs from you, then try to oblige him. And vice versa.
Eradicating these habits from your life won’t make everything perfect, but it may just save your marriage. 

Ways to Prevent Infidelity

In modern marriages, studies have shown that it’s actually quite common for both husbands and wives to cheat. While everyone’s relationship is unique, there are some common issues many couples face in their relationships that aid in the difficulties they experience. When things like stress, miscommunication, resentment and lack of empathy become patterns, the temptation to stray can increase. The following tips may help you to prevent infidelity in your marriage.

Talk About the Hard Stuff

One of the biggest contributors to the breakdown of a marriage is lack of communication, especially about difficult topics like insecurities, hurt feelings and worries. However, by not sharing information regarding these important aspects with a spouse, miscommunication happens. Often, these kinds of misunderstanding could have been avoided by simply talking about them.

Compromise to Meet Each Other’s Needs

Once you’ve discussed your frustrations or hurt feelings with your partner, it’s then time to make sure they are aware of your needs on the subject. You can never assume your spouse should know what you want from them. In addition, more than likely, you’ll need to make compromises to ensure that each partner’s needs are met. When this happens, spouses feel more satisfied and secure. Don’t be afraid to get creative or step out of societal norms when it comes to compromise. Sometimes you need to do things a little different than is traditionally expected. Coming to unique compromise that is right for your individual marriage is more important than what others think.

Put Yourself in Your Partner’s Shoes

Frequently, partners will share their frustrations with each other, but then fail to take action to make changes. Without change, unhealthy patterns will persist. One way to make change happen is to really listen to your partner and try to empathize with their feelings. While you may not fully understand the reason for such feelings, taking time to acknowledge them and validate your partner is experiencing pain has such a positive impact.

Don’t Attribute Intent Where There Is None

Those who do not take the time to empathize with their spouse and try to understand their feelings run the risk of concocting incorrect scenarios in their head. For example, if your spouse gives you the silent treatment, you may assume she is angry. In reality, she may not have intended to seem angry. Instead, her silence may have been her way of signaling her hurt feelings.

Hopefully, these tips can help you to work toward resolving your marital issues. However, sometimes divorce cannot be avoided. In these instances, it’s important to seek the advice of experts like Cordell & Cordell in order to navigate the process more smoothly.

Why You Should Consider Online Dating


Most single men and women think that an online dating website is for those looking for a one-night stand, casual dating, or who are desperate or just plain weird. It’s those people who unwillingly sign up, only to find out that they are completely wrong about dating sites and their members.

Online dating sites are not just for those looking to find a one-night stand or affair. They are also populated by people with serious intentions, and who are simply looking to build long-term relationships with other consenting adults. The ability to list what an individual is looking for (just fun or serious commitment, etc.) can ensure that everyone understands the other person’s intentions and doesn’t get any false pretences about what he or she is looking for.

In addition to this, Internet dating sites are not for the desperate or the weird. They are actually for people who couldn’t find what they’re looking for in their daily lives. Many people don’t want to waste their spare time on countless dates with people who they are not really attracted to, and others may find that they are simply too busy to go on a date with people due to their work schedule. Anyway, there are people from all ages, all walks of life and all cultures on online dating sites, making it an exciting, fun and diverse place to meet new single men and women!

            Free vs. Paid Dating Sites

Once you’ve decided to take the first step in finding your true love or genuine friendship with a person of the opposite sex, you need to determine what dating website(s) to use. There are a great variety of free and paid dating sites available for use in the UK; however, you need to check out the features of each and consider their pluses and minuses.

One thing you have to know is that most of the paid online dating websites offer an “advanced” matching algorithm. While this may sound worth the extra money, you need to remember that neither complex formulae nor computer programs can predict whom your perfect match will be. Moreover, many people find that they are not nearly as successful with their selected matches on dating sites as they are when they browse through a list of singles personally!

            Free dating sites in your area

Free dating websites are the best option for those individuals who are just starting out in the world of online dating, and for those who have been looking for love for a quite while. Online dating sites like BeNaughty.com feature the options most paid dating sites offer at absolutely no cost. Simply log on to BeNaughty or one of the other free dating sites and begin looking at the attractive single men and women near you!

What to Do Before Asking for a Divorce

Whether or not we grown-ups admit it, we are just as enamored and hooked on the movie Frozen as our kids are. But more than the catchy melodies and spanking animation, what endears us to it is the promise of a happy ever after. For some of us though, when things turn sour in our respective marriages, that happy ever after turns into a happy never ever.

It’s not the end of the world when that happens. You can always start anew by asking for a divorce. But before you head in that direction, here are some important things you should do:

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Image credit: GowerandBluck.com

Everyone deserves a second chance.  It’s never too late to pick up the pieces and rebuild your life.  A whole new world will open up to you once you learn to “let it go”.

Of Life and Lemons

In these trying times, we could all use a little sprinkle of inspiration and positivity.  I myself haven’t exactly been frolicking in the snow or making out with a handsome hunk as of late, so when I came across this article by Sandy Balazic, a soon-to-be graduate from ASU’s Walter Cronkite School of Journalism and Mass Communication, I felt it resonate with me.

The article entitled When Life Gives You Lemons, Go Back to School is about a single mom raising 4 children.  In her quest for finding her purpose in life after her divorce, she goes to back to school- with one of her daughters as her classmate.

You can imagine how challenging things get.  Balazic tries to balance being a mom with dealing with math problems.  She explains what it’s like to be the oldest in class and have your daughter as your peer at school.  As she and her daughter learn classroom lessons together, they end up being closer.

Stories like this really get to me.  They help nudge me in the right direction.  Balazic let nothing stand in the way of her dreams.  She is somehow able to invest in herself and raise a family at the same time.

Balazic and her daughter are both graduating from college this spring.  They will then face life feeling fulfilled, accomplished, and more headstrong.

I want to be able to do likewise.  I want to look after my daughter and improve myself while I’m at it.  It’s time I start doing something with these lemons.



Getting Over Being Dumped

In relationships, things could happen in the blink of an eye, either in a good or a bad way. So one moment you are still all lovey-dovey, and the next day you might already be waking up to the terrible fact that you’ve been dumped. You’re going to be a complete mess for the next few days, weeks, or even months. You’re sad, shocked, anguished and hateful. You may feel like it’s the end of the world, and you can never love again. Is there a way out from all this? How to get over it?


Don’t think that you can’t find love again

Many people who are dumped often believe that no one else except their exes could fill the void in their hearts. It’s totally normal to think this way, but don’t let this thought consume you. Try to find a hobby you can indulge in, do anything you want, or simply do nothing at all, and hopefully this can help you take your mind off the ex. More importantly, believe in yourself, your fate, or whatever, that there must be someone else waiting for you among the 7 billion people in the world.


Accept it

This is not rubbing salt on your wounds, but you’ve got to accept that the relationship is over. Your ex was an important part of your life, but not anymore. All those days that you spent together would only remain as memories. It’s painful but you need to learn to accept it. Cry if you must – it’ll make you feel better.


Find someone to talk to

Don’t fight the battle alone; you don’t have to. Find a person you can trust and tell everything in your story, the good times, the bad times, the regrets, everything. Just talk until there’s nothing left in your mind. By then, you should feel slightly better. Don’t resort to drugs or alcohol; all you need is a pair of kind ears, and perhaps a shoulder to cry on if you need it. After all, just having someone listening to you is already a big load off the chest. However, if you still find yourself hanging in a state of extreme depression, it’s better to seek for professional help.


This too shall pass

It takes time for you to get over your ex. Be patient, as the saying goes, “give the time, some time.” All those heart wrenching feelings of grief, despair and loneliness will eventually recede. Soon enough you’ll be back on your feet, and if you’re lucky enough to meet your new love, take it. You don’t have to follow the obscure 3-month or 6-month rules, as long as you’re not using the new partner as a substitute or a scapegoat. Even if you want to try something more unconventional, such as chatroulette or online dating, go for it – just make sure that this time, you know how to protect your heart.


Do you have any other tips for coping with breakups? Please share them, as I might as well learn a thing or two.




Written by: Sybil Serin

Author Bio: A twenty-something girl who’s “been there”. Bouncing back from adversities, she now works hard to improve herself as a better and stronger soul.

Your Kids Don’t Come First

Change is good.  It always is.  And I have to say that I just recently had an epiphany of sorts, and it has altered the way I think and feel in ways I could only previously imagine.

I feel that I have always been overly dependent on my daughter.   I almost feel sorry for putting her in a position where she was my wellspring of happiness and self-worth.  I knew that on a subconscious level, the reason “Do You Wanna Build a Snowman” from Frozen keeps playing inside my head is that I have associated it with my daughter.  Whatever she likes, I like too.  It’s as if I’ve lost my identity and wrapped myself emotionally and mentally around her.  That’s just totally unhealthy.

She was my number one.  Everything else took a step back.  But when I started reading the Wealthy Single Mommy blog, I learned how important it is that we don’t put our kids first.

Now before you feed me to the lions, hear me out.

Yes, I love my daughter.  I love her to the moon and back.  But that doesn’t mean that I live for her.  That she’s the reason for my existence.  Eventually, she’ll grow up and have a life of her own.

My job now is to be an example to her, to show her what it’s like to live a full and rich life.  I have to show her that it’s not her obligation to make me happy, that I can do that by myself.

I realize how my old mindset has carried over to my just-recently-ended romantic relationship.  Probably one of the reasons it didn’t work out, was because my then boyfriend saw how much of a doting mother I was to my daughter.  He felt out of place.  He felt less than important.  If I knew then what I know now, it would have made a whole world of difference.

My daughter is staying at her Dad’s for two weeks.  I’m at the halfway mark, and I’m proud to say that I no longer achingly pine away for her.  The gassy anxiety spells I used to have are now a thing of the past.  I enjoy my time alone, like a normal and healthy adult should.

If and when love comes knocking on my door again, I’ll know better to give him the attention he needs and deserves.  If he asks me out to a Gin Blossoms concert even on a weeknight, I’ll go.

Happy parents make happier kids.  If you know how to take care of yourself, then you’ll be better and more effective at taking care of your children.  That’s how it all adds up in the parenting equation.