How important is religion for singles dating?

Apart from occupying your time on Sundays or affecting which restaurants you dine in, religion in the early days of dating isn’t usually much of an issue. However, for singles thinking long term, it becomes much more important.

Although the principle religion in Canada is Christianity, many spiritual beliefs are prevalent in the population. When dating, religious singles are likely to fall for people with different beliefs to their own. From appeasing family members, raising children to which holidays you celebrate as a couple, faith will be a vital component of your relationship. Let’s look at how religion affects singles looking for love.

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No faith

If you sign up to a dating website like http://www.eharmony.ca/, you can find matches with the same beliefs as you. There’s always a chance you’ll date someone who isn’t spiritual, though. If you have no religion, it can be difficult to understand the importance of someone’s faith. Likewise, if you have beliefs, dating someone who doesn’t can be frustrating.

If the attraction between you is strong enough then it’s possible to compromise. One way to show support is by accompanying your partner to their place of worship.

Levels of observance

In a similar situation to dating someone with no beliefs, there are differing degrees of observance that can present a challenge to singles too. For example, a Jewish man might observe the major holidays but be less strict about other aspects of the faith. His partner on the other hand might be stricter in her beliefs. For Jewish singles that have decided to start dating, this can be a difficult situation. However, it’s important to be understanding of one another’s feelings about their faith.

Do you convert?

Another dilemma that religious singles may have to face – especially if they’re considering marriage – is whether to convert to their partner’s religion. For both sides, this is a big commitment and needs to be discussed openly and honestly. Never assume your partner is willing to covert; they may not be strict but their beliefs are still an important part of who they are.

Raising children

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This stage of your relationship is a long way off. However, the key to a long and happy partnership is sharing similar values and aspirations. If things are looking serious, discuss the important issues now, like raising children in a religious household. Your faith is an important part of your identify. Let your children experience your faith but aim to give them a well-balanced view. They might end up facing similar dilemmas as you one day.

 

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About Pepper

I am a single working mom, trying to raise my kid the best way I know how. Join me as I navigate my way through the jungle that is Single Mom-hood, armed with rose-colored glasses and strength of spirit. As pepper adds spice to food, so does my daughter add spice to my life. She makes life no less than…PEPPERRIFIC!

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Comments

  1. It really depends on how religious that person is. If I were to hypothetically fall in love with a Muslim guy and he wanted me to start wearing the hijab, that would be a little problematic. I am tolerant of moderately practicing religion.

  2. i think its a bit important cause you have to center God in your relationship. but as long as you understand each other and you have one God, then its okay :)

    Rovie
    The Bargain Doll
    :)

  3. liezelice lim says:

    Wow i really have s lot in mind. I guess im glad to have found my partner after 4yrs of being a singlemom. I thinkk the mosy important key in a relationship is you share deep faith, same religion ofcourse. Bcause when everything else fails you know God will work its way in. And it does… never fails

  4. sometimes, religion can become a problem if you don’t tell them right away, it is good to be vocal about it and learn to accept each other.

  5. I think it’s more important than people might realize. I married a non-believer and I am such a believer, so it’s very hard for me when my husband, whom I love very much, says something about there being no God to our children. And it’s hard for him to hear me sharing my faith with them (though he doesn’t mind them going to church, I’m very happy to say). He thinks I’m naive and holding onto non-truths and shoots it down if the kids say something he doesn’t agree with them saying.

    So yes, its Very. Very. Hard. And the older they (the kids) get, the harder it gets for me. It’s hard to take such things into account though, when you’re young, and happily dating the man of your dreams.

    • Thanks for the insight, Rosey. I guess people don’t realize the importance of factoring in religion when it comes to relationships. Yes, we’re all too caught up in the euphoria of love. I hope you somehow find a way to sort things out. It’s always the kids who pay the price in the end.

  6. I used to date a guy belonging to a different religion and it’s quite difficult. Now I value the importance of having the same religions. Though we may not end together, it’s also better to avoid having arguments about family and other principles.

  7. Clarkmartin says:

    I just wanted to comment here and add my two cents: it’s better to figure out sooner rather than later if you are okay with bending the rules that you were so strongly brought up with. You don’t want to be resentful later and have anger or blame. so yeah, be true to yourself now and figure out if lowering your observance level for him is right for you. No one can answer this, but you.

  8. Great post. When my husband and I were dating, he was Baptist and I was Methodist. Nothing extreme. We got married in my church. But as a married a couple we did join a Baptist church. Now we attend a non-denominational one. I am thankful for us it was easy.

  9. I think this is very important I know 1 Christian who married a Jewish man after the kids we’re born they decided it was VERY important to raise the children with one faith. Fortunately it worked out well, but I know others that this has been such an issue after kids it’s actually caused divorce. How ironic religion would actually cause divorce.

  10. Great points singles should definitely consider. My husband and I are totally far apart in our beliefs, but surprisingly, we have made it work with zero issues over religion over the past 15 years. I guess it just boils down to respecting one’s choices and not forcing your beliefs on the other that makes it work.

  11. It is good that both of you have the same religion. Better from the start as a single you have to talk with the person with whom your dating with the differences you have rather than keep it then at end SEPARATION or DIVORCE will take effect because of so much difference and RELIGION is one of the problems.

  12. I agree with you that it is important. It may be difficult for 2 people from different faiths to join together because their beliefs are so different. However, if you are more lax in your beliefs then it may not be as much of a problem. My dad was catholic and my mom was Methodist and he ended up joining the Methodist church which worked for him. He believes in God and that was enough for him.

  13. Though I do some couples with differing views who can make it work in their marriage/relationship, I know that most do not survive those types of differences. I find it mildly important in the beginning of a relationship, but VERY important in the long term. Especially when children are involved :)

  14. Hi Pepper. Well, I believe this issue is absolutely critical. I could explain why, but I think the article whose link I will put below says it much better than I ever could.

    http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2012/01/23/dont-take-it-from-me-reasons-you-should-not-marry-an-unbeliever/

  15. Nice article, I’m totally agree with @christina’s point “depends on how religious that person is” now I understand the value of why & how religion is important for single dating.

  16. Disha Sharma says:

    I’m 100% agree with @christina. I understand religion becomes problem in love but I don’t understand why religion come in love & why our society give important to religion for relationship & love.

  17. lamia alansari says:

    have a look at this great dating site-http://dating-mbxrsyk7.yourpopularcbreviews.com

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