When Parents Get Angry

A watched pot never boils, but when it does, handle it carefully, lest it spills over and scalds your arm.  An irate mom can be just as hazardous when she tends to helplessly boil over after her kids do something to get on her nerves. 

No matter how much we love our kids, sometimes we just can’t help but lash out at them.  That anger may have been triggered by something unacceptable they’ve done, but we parents must realize that losing our temper in front of our kids can be detrimental to their overall well-being.  Studies show that parents who express a lot of anger in front of their kids end up with less empathetic children.  They end up being more aggressive and depressive.  It’s worse with younger kids, because to them, you are their world.  Seeing you angry just shatters their world.

We parents are only human, so being angry is inevitable.  What’s important is how we handle our anger.  One useful tip is, at the heat of anger, try to visualize your kid as a baby.  When we see our children as the adorable babies they once were, this helps fizzle down the anger. 

If you can, try to physically walk away from the situation, even for just a minute or two.  The brief distance will help you somehow regain your sense of calm.

If you’ve lost control and have lashed out at your kid already, own up to it.  Say something like, “I’m not happy with what you did, but I shouldn’t have shouted at you like that.  I’m sorry”.   Promise that you’ll try your hardest not to do that again, comfort your child, and move on.

About Pepper

I am a single working mom, trying to raise my kid the best way I know how. Join me as I navigate my way through the jungle that is Single Mom-hood, armed with rose-colored glasses and strength of spirit. As pepper adds spice to food, so does my daughter add spice to my life. She makes life no less than…PEPPERRIFIC!

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Comments

  1. However much the children get on our nerves it’s best we control the anger in us.Anger is unhealthy.We tend to say some unpleasant things in anger and regret it later.Then it is too late to fix. .

  2. Trying to be calm at times is really hard to do, but i learned how to deal with my temper through the years of my motherhood :)

  3. I try so hard not to blow it. When you have your child full time all the time, it gets tough. I hear others yelling at their kids and I scoff and feel sorry for their children, but I need to be that person when I’m getting ready to lose it with mine. I see my own behaviour and reactions reflected in his behaviour. It mirrors my own at times and I feel so guilty about it.

    • I too feel guilty whenever I lose it in front of my kid. But we’re only human, I guess. We can only do so much.

  4. I once locked myself in the bathroom whilst my son raged in front of the door mid-tantrum! I had to get away like you say. Sometimes it’s just too much and your need to get awake for both the sake of your sanity and for the sake of your child!

  5. Oh! I so can relate to this! My 5 year old son is really testing my patience. He’s a smarty pants, know it all, while being so adorable and cute at the same time. Oh well! :)

  6. So true! Yelling at us or to whoever won’t resolve the problem between the two parties. It can make the matter worse. So as the parent, as the more mature one, it’s better to handle the anger effectively and understand the situation and your kiddo. Both parties can meet half way when both have calm presence :)

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