How Not To Miss Someone

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. What they don’t tell you is that it can also make you insane. Being away from the one you hold most dear sometimes finds you staring blankly at the ceiling with a profuse amount of drool slowly making its way down your chin.

Possibly one of the saddest things that could happen to anyone of us is to be miles away from the one we love. As much as we’d always want to just keep them close and put them on a leash, certain life circumstances inevitably push us into dreaded situations where we or they have to be physically away for long periods. Sometimes it’s a job, school or the army which forces the one we love to pack his bags and fly off to distant lands.

Heart-wrenching as it is, we are left with no choice but to cope. So how do we do that, in between wiping off the drool and tears from our cheeks? Here are some things you can do to survive:

Hide those calendars. The more you count the days until you’re reunited with your love, the longer it seems.

Immerse yourself in reality talent shows. Who would’ve thought Simon Cowell can be therapeutic? You can spend hours cheaply amusing yourself simply by watching those singing or dancing shows. Don’t let anyone stop you, if you feel like joining the show yourself.

Do crossword puzzles. Do those which fill an entire magazine page. Stretch your brain to its limits.

Blog. If you don’t have one, comment on other blogs. What can be more fun than peeking into other people’s lives? Count. Okay, when it’s only a few weeks to go before your loved one gets back, then you can start taking out that calendar and counting the days. At least you’ll have something to look forward to.

But if you choose to go down the old beaten path of painting the town red with your friends and drowning yourself in alcohol in an attempt to numb the pain, that’s perfectly fine. Just take responsibility for that nasty, post-party hangover.

At the end of the day, no matter how busy you try to make yourself, you might still find yourself pining for your distant love. Once you hit the sack, that’s when reality hits you and the tears begin to trickle again. All you’re left with then is an aching heart… and a wet pillow.

About Pepper

I am a single working mom, trying to raise my kid the best way I know how. Join me as I navigate my way through the jungle that is Single Mom-hood, armed with rose-colored glasses and strength of spirit. As pepper adds spice to food, so does my daughter add spice to my life. She makes life no less than…PEPPERRIFIC!

Catch me on G+.


  1. Crossword puzzles worked well for me…but figuratively speaking, no drools for me…xoxo

  2. Uh, I can’t even find my calendar as it is…so check.

  3. I was deeply touched by your post. Being miles away from the one we love is indeed the saddest thing that could happen to anyone of us. I guess I have to get a hanky..

  4. I just can’t stop thinking about him Peps..but I am still grateful because we talk twice a day..even on phone our love keeps on getting least I had a chance of hearing him..I can also attest to it Peps sometimes I get tired of waiting when will we meet or as with you when will you meet again..but at least you are still have been with him many times..time will come Peps when the wedding bells will be ringing and you will be with him for the rest of your life ;)

  5. You got some great tips;-) What worked for me were korean reality shows, I’m too busy reading subtitles to think about anything else;-)Sometimes it really, physically hurts when your heart is beating somewhere else in the world.

  6. it happened to me n twice. the first one was almost 2 mos tpos isang 9 mos. its klling me!! i dnt wanna hapen it again sana kaso wala choice ;(

  7. 108 days to go.. ooops! I did it again. hehe! Watching reality shows somehow worked for me. ^_^

  8. What a great, heartfelt post. If only we could snap our fingers and we would be back in the arms of those we love. I found when I was separated from my loved one I grew to appreciate him even more. I was thankful for that.

    • Yes, I wish they’d invent a teleporting (or is it teleportation?) device so we can instantly be within arm’s reach of our loved one :). I guess you’re right about appreciating him more when apart.

  9. sounds like you really love this guy… :)

  10. gaaaaaaah…I starved myself and lost weight when I miss the hubby lol…I also did a lot of house cleaning! That added to the weight loss and of course a cleaner house when he came home means +++ points lol. Your heart is going fonder dear…it will endure the distance. :)

  11. This post made me smile. I remembered believing I couldn’t possibly continue breathing because the lump in my chest grew larger with each passing day. But I did! :) You’ll make it.

  12. Brilliant! Now that my husband has been away for 5 weeks I can say blogging, arts&crafts and no calendars hanging on the door are perfect……….and Chocolate!! I resisted till last week but no more!

  13. You can make it…see you’ve already got ways to pass the time. But I don’t think missing anyone ever gets easier!

  14. Love your blog! And I love this list of get-through tricks. :-)

  15. Mari Ramirez says

    My hubbys has left to Idaho. And im in texas. I miss him so much. he’s gone for about 7 weeks. And its killing me. i try to distract and keep myself busy, but in the night i cry myself to sleep. Oh and to make it even worse i cant talk to him for about 2 weeks. )’:

  16. love and living says

    i guess, it’s really true that it hurts for a while but then if you will try to focus on different things aside from your own feelings, you will learn or what i say, you can master how not to miss them anymore.

    pain is inevitable and long distance love affair is really hard but if you have the love in your heart, it can be your own blanket

  17. I can’t imagine being away from my hubby for more than 2 or 3 weeks at a time. I hope that if you are away from your loved one right now, you are reunited soon and that you find good ways to pass the time.

  18. Going back to school is a great distraction too! One of my classmates is going through dental hygiene school with me while her hubby is stationed out of town in the air force. I really admire her for getting through school and taking care of her two kids at the same time.

  19. Hmm… this is my first time to your blog. I am not sure about the details of your post… but my husband is about to leave for almost 2 weeks- and I know I am not looking forward to it. I am sure I will keep busy- it is just sleeping alone that I don’t like. And of course, miss him!

  20. Anne @GreenEggs&Moms says

    Awww! Well if you ever feel like this, we can have coffee. We still need to set that eb thing :D

  21. Keeping busy is definitely best because when there’s nothing to do all you end up doing is thinking of the person. Going out with friends, getting lost in a good book, or blogging always work for me.

  22. Aww…I hope you’re not personally relating w/this story, it felt so personal. The tips are good ones!

  23. Carla Barilá Karam says

    Pepper… you’re right! It can be heart wrenching… but doing a special something for the one you miss each day is a great way to pass the time. Write a special journal with thoughts, have the little one do art work each day… and there you have it a special journal or book with illustrations and all! Grace, peace and blessings, Carla

  24. reality tv helps me a lot!:)

  25. If only I could find a way to help my husband cope with missing his two beautiful daughters that he is separated from right now. This is something I attempt, think about, and struggle with every day. The worst part is always coming to the same conclusion: there’s really nothing I can do to make it better.

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