Religion Bites

About two weeks ago, I did something which I haven’t done in ages- I went to church.  I went through the motions like I always have.   Growing up in a Catholic school, making the sign of the cross and clutching the rosary used to be part of my everyday life.

And then something happened… I cried.  Not the bawl your eyes out kind.  It was more of the silent, sniffy, discreetly-pat-your-eyes-with-a-tissue type of crying.

When I was a kid, I remember feeling a sense of calm and comfort whenever I went to church.  I felt that same comfort that moment I cried, but I knew something was amiss.  For the life of me, I don’t know exactly why I cried, but I just felt deep down inside that I was still looking for answers to questions.

No doubt, I believe in God. But I just want to be guided correctly.  I don’t want to fall prey to empty pagan practices.  I want to believe in what is true.

I don’t have anything against the Catholic religion- or any religion, for that matter.  If it’s religion which gives people hope and strength, then I’m all for it.

Faith, they say, is believing without knowing (or something like that!).  Does the fact that I want some sort of evidence of what is real diminish my faith in God?  Am I going to be fed to the lions now?

About Pepper

I am a single working mom, trying to raise my kid the best way I know how. Join me as I navigate my way through the jungle that is Single Mom-hood, armed with rose-colored glasses and strength of spirit. As pepper adds spice to food, so does my daughter add spice to my life. She makes life no less than…PEPPERRIFIC!

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  1. Oh you’re not! I felt so much guilt with this post. I too feel calmness inside the church I don’t know what kind of serenity it brings me but I just feel calm. I haven’t been inside a church for months so that makes us two now.

  2. This happens to me, a lot of times, not just during church service. I always consider it as a personal encounter with God, when he touches our hearts in an overwhelming way that all we could do is cry, not of anguish but I think it’s some sort of a stirring of the soul. It’s really hard to explain.

    Sis, personally, I believe it’s not about religion or just attending services, but having a personal relationship with God. Faith to me is believing in a God we do not see physically, but knowing and trusting His presence in our lives.

  3. sigrid @ lovingly mama says

    I haven’t been in church for many months coz I didn’t go out much on the last part of my pregnancy. I only went to church last Sunday and today. It has been a while. We are relatively new in this church. While there is something that has been holding us back from making a commitment, I like coming here. We had stayed in one church for a very long time but now, we are shying away from commitment.

    But what I do know is that I need constant fellowship. I am like charcoal that gets cool when I am not with other Bible-believing Christians.

    One thing I can tell you, seek your answers from the Bible and pray your heart out to the Lord–as in speak directly to Him. He will lead you in the right path. :D God bless you sis–as you seek Him. :D

  4. Good! Our church has thgaut us that the best way to show the mercy and love of God is by ourselves, by how we behave, how we react to different things, how we improve, how we change…… I think, that is what you tried to ask for in the article, right? If you can’t be a role model, there’s nothing the others can take from you.

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