The One About Love (Or Lack Thereof!)

I can’t help it.  Toni Braxton’s Breathe Again- alternating with Color Me Badd’s All for Love- keeps playing inside my head.  Apart from the obvious fact that I’m stuck in a music time warp, I just feel that I’m in a non-Barry Manilow-ish, romantic mood.

I want to love and be loved again.  I miss holding hands, warm hugs, butterfly kisses… the works.  I want long walks on the beach, laughing in the rain.  I miss eating off each other’s plates, as he tucks strands of my hair behind my ear…

Oh dear, this is beginning to sound like something off an online dating site profile!

Personally, I don’t believe that love just happens.   You find love on purpose.  If you want to be a lawyer, you go to law school.  If you want to find love, you look for it- or I guess more appropriately- you make things happen.  It’s not easy, but once you reap the rewards, there are simply no words to describe the joy which comes with it.

I’d probably flunk love school, if there was one.  It’s just been one failed relationship after another.  Despite my conscious efforts to not repeat old mistakes, somehow, things still fall apart.  It’s one of life’s mysteries which I may never have the answers to.

But I guess I won’t give up.  I can’t give up.  Life’s too short for that.  Although bruised all over, I have to get up and just go on.

One foot in front of the other…

Chewing Gum and Love

Forrest Gump said that “Life is like a box of chocolates- you’ll never know what you’re gonna get”.  Love, for me, is like a piece of gum- it starts off hard, then once you chew it, it becomes soft inside your mouth.  It becomes comfortable and adds an element of fun to an otherwise dreary life.   Just like baseball players chewing on a piece of Big League Chew gum during a game, love makes our jobs and life in general feel like a fun game.

I guess I can safely say that I’m at this stage when I’m still looking for that special “gum”.  I’m not actively looking, but am open to the possibility of fun and romance.

It’s nothing short of amazing how life pokes fun at you.  Just when you think you’ve hit rock bottom, along comes somebody to make things look colorful and rosy once again.  You meet someone who does an emotional CPR on you, and jump starts you back into life.  You get a major perspective shift, and a genuine smile begins to show on your face.

I’m pretty optimistic that that day will come for me.  And when it does, I’m sure that gum will taste so good.

Roses Speak Louder Than Words

I have to get the carpenters to work on it, quickly.  I think I may have made a hole which shot straight off the roof when I leapt for joy a couple of hours ago.  Can’t you tell? I am simply joyous beyond words.  Happy doesn’t nearly describe how I feel right now.   I don’t want to sound cheesy and all, but yes, I am a giddy schoolgirl-fresh-from-prom-night reincarnate.

Three red roses found their way to my doorstep today.  I was surprised, to say the least… make that pleasantly surprised.  Mr. Significant Other (SO) turns out to have a romantic bone in his body, who would’ve known?  We are miles away from each other, and I just find it utterly sweet of him to have come up with the idea of sending me roses.

This is the first time in my entire life that anyone has given me roses.  Seriously.  I couldn’t even begin to describe all the various involuntary bodily responses which overcame me as I gingerly received that box of roses from the delivery man.  I felt a wave of unidentifiable emotions come over me.  As Christopher Cross oh so melodiously puts it, I was swept away.

I can just stare at them flowers all day…

How Not To Miss Someone

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. What they don’t tell you is that it can also make you insane. Being away from the one you hold most dear sometimes finds you staring blankly at the ceiling with a profuse amount of drool slowly making its way down your chin.

Possibly one of the saddest things that could happen to anyone of us is to be miles away from the one we love. As much as we’d always want to just keep them close and put them on a leash, certain life circumstances inevitably push us into dreaded situations where we or they have to be physically away for long periods. Sometimes it’s a job, school or the army which forces the one we love to pack his bags and fly off to distant lands.

Heart-wrenching as it is, we are left with no choice but to cope. So how do we do that, in between wiping off the drool and tears from our cheeks? Here are some things you can do to survive:

Hide those calendars. The more you count the days until you’re reunited with your love, the longer it seems.

Immerse yourself in reality talent shows. Who would’ve thought Simon Cowell can be therapeutic? You can spend hours cheaply amusing yourself simply by watching those singing or dancing shows. Don’t let anyone stop you, if you feel like joining the show yourself.

Do crossword puzzles. Do those which fill an entire magazine page. Stretch your brain to its limits.

Blog. If you don’t have one, comment on other blogs. What can be more fun than peeking into other people’s lives? Count. Okay, when it’s only a few weeks to go before your loved one gets back, then you can start taking out that calendar and counting the days. At least you’ll have something to look forward to.

But if you choose to go down the old beaten path of painting the town red with your friends and drowning yourself in alcohol in an attempt to numb the pain, that’s perfectly fine. Just take responsibility for that nasty, post-party hangover.

At the end of the day, no matter how busy you try to make yourself, you might still find yourself pining for your distant love. Once you hit the sack, that’s when reality hits you and the tears begin to trickle again. All you’re left with then is an aching heart… and a wet pillow.

Yet Another Cheesy Post…

How can any woman in her right mind not fall in love with a man who pulls over to the side of the road, thumbs through his mp3 list, and chooses a song to sing to you in perfect pitch, complete with hand gestures?  Mr. SO has reincarnated in me an appreciation for Barry Manilow and The Carpenters.  Well, more than old songs, he has rekindled in me a sense of faith in true love.

He doesn’t give me flowers, but he buys me yummy ice cream, even on a rainy night.  He strips his fried chicken of its crunchy, MSG-rich skin and puts it on my plate- because he knows I love to eat chicken skin.  He buys me a week’s supply of my favorite creamy dessert.  He holds my hand as he shifts gears while driving.

I can go on all day about the wonderful things my man does to make me feel loved and special.  It doesn’t take much to make me feel like a spoiled Victoria Beckham, and Mr. SO seems to know how to keep me deliriously happy.

Whatever your special someone does for you, what’s important is you show him how much you value and appreciate his efforts.  A quick peck on the cheek or a shoulder rub at the end of the day- or giving him total domination over the TV remote control, as he watches his favorite game- is enough to show your man that you are thankful for the things he’s done for you.  That makes it all worthwhile.

What has your man done for you lately?